Kingdom Pursuit.

A few weeks ago, I was given an opportunity to co-lead and watch over 5 girls at Elevate Summer Camp through The Summit Church. It was life changing. Here’s why.

Of course I could go into how the week was challenging and physically exhausting, but that isn’t the point I want to stress here. The reason why camp was so life changing for me was that it reinstated my purpose, my call in life.

And that call is to pursue the Kingdom of God with all that I am.

More than any previous year of my life, 2017 stands out as the year where my God has pursued me and transformed me by the Gospel. Even though I accepted Jesus and begun a relationship with him in 2012, I have never experienced the radical faithfulness of God in my life as much as I have the past 7 months.

Going into camp, I knew that God was going to convict and call His children to Himself. I had been praying for months and months faithfully that God would show up BIG TIME and radically change hearts. Which He did. Obviously.

But, one thing I didn’t think about as much going into camp was how God was going to further affirm my identity in Christ and convict my heart to pursue His Kingdom as my number one priority in my life.

While pursuing the Kingdom of God changes the trajectory of your life plans and goals, it also radically alters your day-to-day actions, responses, and mindset.

[Specifically, it changes the way you see your identity, how you worship, how you commune with God daily, and the way you prioritize evangelism and Gospel intentionality]


In a culture where we typically find our identity in pursuing praise, worldly pleasures, or success, pursuing the Kingdom of God grants us a new identity… that is worth surpassingly more. Since fully embracing Christ’s identity for me, I have experienced the sweetest freedom in surrender. He sees me as His beloved daughter, and that changes every thought I think about myself and my own worth.


“Worship is our intentional response to who God is, and what He has done.”

I learned this definition of worship at camp, and it has come to shape my view of worship, my mindset as I approach God in worship, and how I structure my actions and words throughout the day as instruments by which I can worship God. In deciding to pursue the Kingdom, worship is more than just a time I sing songs to God on Sunday morning, or in my car on the way to the gym during the week. A quote I have come back to (on multiple occasions the past few weeks) regarding worship was spoken by Graham Kendrick:

“Worship has been misunderstood as something that arises from a feeling which ‘comes upon you’, but it is vital that we understand that it is rooted in a conscious act of the will, to serve and obey the Lord Jesus Christ.”


We were born into sinful humanity, separated from God and the ability to commune with Him. When Jesus died in our place, He bridged the gap between man and God and made a way for us to know God personally, through taking our sin as His own on the cross. This is the good news!

Unfortunately, a lot of people don’t understand or accept the magnitude of this act and have not been transformed by what Christ has done and promised for them. That, or they don’t choose to dwell on this good gift, and allow Satan to blind their eyes to the Gospel and distract them by the desires of the flesh. People CHOOSE to be separated from God still, when the free gift is right in front of their face.

Jesus has captured my heart and mind in a way that I would have never been able to do on my own. I would have never chosen Him and His goodness freely, unless He gave me the ability and desire to choose Him. This is the greatest gift I have ever been given. Because of this, my greatest desire is to be with Him every day.

If we proclaim with our lips that Jesus Christ is Lord, He calls us to a greater purpose and way of life… living daily in relationship with Him– through prayer and reading His word.

Delving into scripture may be a daunting task, but God has given us the Bible to teach us about His own nature and character that completely shapes our view of God and the way we go about our lives. It’s a gift!

God has chosen for us to pursue His Kingdom and righteousness this way… through convening DAILY with Jesus. He is the ONLY way, truth, and the life. Relationship with Him allows us to run after His Kingdom and towards righteousness.

Intentional Evangelism.

This is the part where I (and other Christians alike) tend to get a little uncomfortable. If you have grown up in church, I am sure you heard that Jesus calls and commands us to GO and MAKE DISCIPLES of all nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father, Son, and Spirit. This is an especially hot topic at The Summit Church at least.

I was totally brought to my knees in repentance and conviction when my pastor posed this question on the last night of camp: “Do your actions match up with what you say you believe about the Gospel?”

I scrambled to write the phrase down as he spoke it, and then it hit me. If my life doesn’t act as a testimony to what I believe, and if I am not daily convicted of sin and the necessity to let others know what is true, is my relationship with Jesus authentic? Am I too going to stand before the throne on judgement day and God is going to send me away, saying He never knew me?

This isn’t the first time I’ve been convicted of the necessity to share the Gospel with others. But this time, it was different. The past couple months, I have been radically praying for God to use me for His good purposes, whatever they may be. I have had big ideas. But, how much have I been praying for God to transform my life in the mundane, that my life will be a testimony to who God is? How often have I prayed for God to use me in the margin, in the small moments, not just in huge, spotlight moments?

Oh how my prayers have been directed towards my own praise without even knowing or being able to repent of it.

This is just my own personal experience and thoughts regarding evangelism though. There is much more to it than that.

We are told in Ephesians to live a life worthy of the manner by which we have been called. Meaning, our daily lives and attitudes, AS WELL AS our grand feats and desires, should be soaked in Gospel intentionality.

Yet, because of God’s grace and provision for us, this call doesn’t have to be scary. The Holy Spirit empowers and speaks through us, and convicts us in times when we need to look like Jesus. We will not suddenly gain bravery to share the Gospel alone, but through the power of the Spirit and boldness of prayer.

Evangelism is hard. But we are called. And we must go. Wherever and whenever, to whomever He calls. 

These are just a few ways in which we pursue the Kingdom of God with our whole lives. I’m sure I have missed stuff, but for me, it’s a start. We will never achieve perfect pursuit of God until the new heavens and earth are created and we get to live with Him for eternity.

[[If I was reminded of nothing else at camp, it was how worthy God and His Kingdom are worth pursuing. And, as a part of this, I am called to boldly declare the Gospel and God’s unmatchable goodness. I am so encouraged by this gift I have and cannot wait to pursue God’s Kingdom as long as I live, and into eternity.]]

I want to close with a question directed at you, who’s reading this. Okay… maybe a few questions. If you haven’t figured it out by now this far down into my post, I have a lot to say. Always.

Have you ever accepted Jesus’ free gift of grace? If you have, are you actively pursuing His Kingdom each day? Are you delving into intimate relationship with Him? Is the Kingdom of God and the spread of Jesus’ name your purpose?

Jesus is my Savior, Lord, and King. I will never stop proclaiming His name or pursuing the call He has on my life: to be in relationship with Him, and to tell people who He is and what He’s done.

I pray eagerly that you will, too.


my sweet jesus’ blog post:

I get it. All of our hearts go wayward for a little. You want the real thing. You want to be overwhelmed in His presence. You want to feel Him like fire in your bones, like wind in your chest. You want to yearn for Him. You want to be passionately in love with Him. […]

via It’s Real. — mysweetjesus

i’m thankful for my tight leash.

I like to put my God in a box.

It’s comforting. A safe bet. Instinctive, even.

But… that eventually catches up to me. It brings disappointment and unmet expectations. Frustration. Entitlement. Discontentment. Honestly, my most difficult struggles in my walk with Jesus have resulted from expecting Him to do something according to my timetable, or allowing myself to be frustrated at God when His idea for my life didn’t quite align with my own.

Because, you know, the world revolves around me. God is my magical genie. Why do I feel like God isn’t even listening?

I have executed the pinnacle of entitlement and ignorance, folks. On many occasions.

Thank goodness that my God consistently breaks the walls down that I attempt to suppress Him in. He recognizes that I’m totally out-to-lunch half the time. So, he is faithful to not leave me hanging with stones made to ashes at my feet and flames abounding.

And He reminds me of what is true.

Sometimes, God uses people and situations to echo His character. For example… my mentor (who’s basically Wonder Woman) said something super intriguing to me today.

She told me that I should thank God that He has me on a tight leash.

At first, I almost laughed. What in the world is that supposed to mean?

As I prodded for a better explanation, she reminded me that because I have experienced intimacy with God and walk with Him daily, I would never be able to find the same fulfillment anywhere else. Even if I tried to run, the weight of sin and discontentment would quickly grip me the moment I strayed too far. What an amazing act of love and protection!

I know the leash analogy may seem a little controlling or ridiculous, but try to go with me on this.

God loves and pursues me so faithfully to the point where I would never want to run. I would never even attempt to seek everlasting joy in anything else. He has drawn me close to Himself so relentlessly that I could never turn away at this point. His grace is MORE than sufficient for me and His power has been perfected through my weaknesses. The more I learn to keep my hands open, the more his strength is multiplied within me and the clearer my ears and heart become to hear his voice.

To me, that’s one of the most profound aspects of God’s perfect character.

You see, the closer I draw near to my Lord Jesus, the more and more He displays who He really is.

I believe that because of our fallen nature and futile minds that we will never be able to fully grasp the glory of God in our lives, but He is faithful to reveal layers to us the closer we cling to Him.

That’s the thing about trying to put God in a box. He will cut down every expectation you try to place on Him and show you how His plans and character are so much deeper, greater, and more fulfilling than you could ever dream of.

Right now, I am learning that the more I cling to what is true about God, the more He is breaking down the walls I have tried to box Him into.

He daily draws me into His presence to reveal another aspect of his infinite love and faithfulness.

He continues the practice of unclenching my hands and allowing me to find the freedom in total surrender.

He steadfastly reveals my sins to me in such a way to further my dependence on Him and my reverence towards Him.

His unstoppable love becomes more real. I will never thirst or need for anything, because He holds me gently in His arms. His love breaks all chains.

If you’re still with me at this point, I would encourage you to read Ephesians 3: 14-20.

The more God roots and grounds us in His love,  and(the more faithfully He tears down our boxes we put Him in as we draw near to Him), the greater we will get to know God and fall in love with Him.

We have the ability to love and be loved by God in an intimate relationship with Him. HE CHOOSES US. It all comes down to us accepting His free gift of grace.

Now that is love.

Butterflies. — mysweetjesus

Sister. I do not feel very bold. I have butterflies in my stomach more often than not. I just care too much about what people think, and I doubt my natural ability to succeed. So my stomach is often fluttering and fretting, my palms sweaty, and my knees weak. (If you got that, let’s be […]

via Butterflies. — mysweetjesus

Greater Joy

“Our greater joy is Jesus”

Audacious Woman

We can get weary in this race that was given to us. The problems and the circumstances sometimes can be too much for us to bear. We hear all the time ‘don’t give up’ – from friends or family or through social media or posts. We look to the right and to the left and we see other people getting promoted, others being successful, others getting married or having children, others having their businesses taken off, others achieving their goals and dreams that maybe be similar to yours and then you look at yourself. You wonder why you are where you are, even being already blessed, but because of your perception of what other people have, whether better and greater than what you have or where you are – you are now distracted. You have lost sight of what you have, what has been given to you and promised to…

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Everything — Lines of Lazarus

Over the years I let my heart fall into disrepair, like an abandoned, dilapidated house. The type that people throw stones at, to break windows for sport. It was a place condemned, where my soul felt sorrow to reside. I dreamed of going back so I could fix, everything. I would have cleared out weeds […]

via Everything — Lines of Lazarus

no season is ever wasted.

I feel like I’m wasting time.

As a Type A, highly motivated & efficient person, wasting time is one of my biggest pet peeves.

I mean, don’t even get me started about slow drivers and long lines. The tolerance level is very, very LOW.

Of course, those are but temporary situations where my impatience displays itself. It’s a whole other story when it comes to my spiritual life.

In the past couple months, I’ve completely surrendered my life and future plans to God like never before. And, as result, I’ve found the sweetest sense of freedom & reliance on my Lord and Savior.

But, the past couple weeks have shown to be a pretty quiet season. And the silence is deafening.

God has stirred in me an immense desire to be used by Him and to be instrumental in bringing people to know Jesus. And Praise God for that! I am a sinner & completely unworthy, but He still chooses me to know Him and do His work.

God has instilled dreams & hopes in me of how He will allow me to serve Him, but has then dropped (seemingly) silent.

I think that’s the hardest part. I KNOW that God plans to use me to do great things, but I don’t know WHEN.

So instead of basking in the waiting season & focusing on equipping myself in knowing Scripture and finding my identity in Christ, I have found myself impatient, unhappy, and frustrated.

I want to be used NOW. The amount of times I’ve approached God with an entitled and questioning demeanor the past couple weeks is more than I’d want to admit. But who am I, a beggar, unworthy to sit at Jesus’ feet, to be entitled in His presence?

Unfortunately, I’ve noticed that the waiting season is where Satan has been planting seeds of envy, doubt, and entitlement in my heart. He is trying to convince me that I am being unfairly treated, and that I DESERVE better.

As if I deserve ANYTHING from a perfect God.

But, my ever faithful God is gracious enough to remind me of what is true when the seeds of lies start to take root in my heart. He is worthy of all honor and praise.

Last night, in another time of frustration and impatience, I was talking to God & wrote these sentences in my journal:

“I have absolutely no clue what you’re doing in this season of my life. Why are you making me wait? All I want to do is serve You and do big things for Your Kingdom, but You aren’t showing up. You aren’t telling me where to go. Lord Jesus, please show me what you’re doing.”

And silence. I was pretty fed up at this point & went to check my instagram. Constructive right?

But as stupid as this sounds, God reminded me of what is true there. The first post I saw was a beautiful calligraphy drawing of the phrase:

No season is ever  wasted.

An interesting way for God to speak, right? I actually laughed out loud when I saw it. You got me God. He definitely has a sense of humor.

 Despite the frustration and impatience and waiting to be used by God, He is faithful to keep me right where I need to be. He is faithful to equip me. and He is faithful to use every season to its fullness.

So, I wait. But I do not wait in vain.

 I am not wasting time. He holds me in the palm of His hand & must strengthen me in my relationship with Him and identity before I can move on to the next season of my life. 

And that is enough right now.